Taxotere is Evil!

I was doing pretty well for the first two days. Even went for a walk to the bank and post office on Thursday. On Friday I was starting to feel kind of achy in my joints and bones (like when you have the flu) and my whole mouth felt like I scalded it with hot soup. By Saturday I was just completely worn out. I could hardly move. It took all my strength just to roll over or to sit up for a drink of water. On Sunday I got a fever and I was instructed to go to emergency if my temperature went to 38 as this can mean I have an infection. So somehow I mustered up the strength to get dressed and haul myself out to the car. The ER doctor had my blood tested and he thought my blood was okay. He did write me a prescription for antibiotics but wanted me to call my oncologist Monday morning before filling it. Dr A’s nurse had them fax my results to them and he said I definitely need to be on the antibiotics. Too bad I didn’t start them the day before because today (Wednesday) is the first time I have the energy to do more than sit up for 5 minutes. My mouth is so sore that I can’t eat much. What I do eat I can’t really taste and everything feels like chalk and hurts all the sores in there. I have the white coating on my tongue again. My face started to get flushed on Sunday and today it is still flaming red, hot to touch and raw. I have cold sores too! My neck and chest are red and itchy. After being constipated since the beginning of all this I am now going the other way. I don’t know which is worse. Not sure if I can do this two more times… I am really happy that I am well enough to be able to go and watch Roxanne’s convocation tomorrow.

Round 4 - Taxotere

On Tuesday I had my blood work done and saw Dr A. The more I see him the more I like him. Since I’ve had so many side effects from the first cocktail he decided to start me on the Taxotere alone and he will introduce the Herceptin next time if all goes well. This way we can see which drug is causing problems. My blood is good to go but I was horrified to discover that I gained 8 pounds in the last 6 weeks!!! They all assure me that this is from the Dexamethasone (which is a steroid) that I had to take for 5 days after the first three treatments. Now I have to take it the day before, the day of and the day after for this one. It makes my face red and hot from my eyebrows to my chest and it makes my face puffy like a big moon. (Not very attractive!) It also makes you want to eat all the time! It kept me awake the first night so the doctor prescribed some sleeping pills for me. Last night I had the best sleep – 7 hours straight (well one bathroom break and it felt like I was walking on tree stumps to get there). The main thing that the Dexamethasone is supposed to help with is to keep you from retaining fluid in your arms and legs and to help with nausea.

They monitor you very closely when you are getting the Taxotere for the first time. The nurse checks on you every few minutes and they take your blood pressure every 15 minutes. You are to watch for shortness of breath, heart palpitations, skin rash or back ache. Fortunately all went well for me. Another side effect of this one is nail changes – they can turn yellow or orange and get very brittle. To combat that I had to wear cold gel packs on my hands and feet for the two hours of the infusion. You can’t do anything with big oven mitts on your hands so just listened to my ipod to pass the time. They are very up on everything there and sent me home with a Taxotere kit. It had nail hardener, lotion for the dry skin, soft toothbrush and sensitive toothpaste, alcohol free mouthwash and of course more information.

Other than taking a few extra anti-nausea drugs yesterday all has been good! So far everything I’ve eaten yesterday and today hasn’t bothered me. Besides the Dexamethasone I only have to take the other drugs as needed so no more 22 pills a day for me! YAY I don’t know when the side effects of this one are supposed to kick in. I do have some eye tearing but there is also the numbness and tingling in hands joints and muscles, shortness of breath, nausea, red itchy shedding skin, mouth sores among others that can happen. Maybe I will be lucky this time!

Look Good Feel Better

Yesterday I had the opportunity to attend a Look Good Feel Better Workshop. My friend Petra drove me to the city and we had a really nice day going out for lunch, shopping and attending the workshop – thanks again Petra! These workshops were created from the concept that if a woman living with cancer can be helped to look good, her improved self image will help her to approach cancer and its treatments with greater confidence. Through special cosmetic techniques and hair alternatives, women are taught how to manage the appearance related side effects of cancer and its treatment. These (totally free) two hour workshops are offered in many hospitals and cancer care facilities across the country by over 1200 dedicated, certified volunteers along with facility coordinators and community partners.

I already had my wig and I knew most of the make up techniques they taught but I was really happy to learn how to draw natural looking eyebrows. My next three treatments will likely cause them to fall out. In addition each of us taking the workshop came away with close to $250 worth of cosmetics and skin care products that are all donated by the Canadian Cosmetic, Toiletry and Fragrance Association (CCTFA) Member Companies. If you want to learn some of the techniques, check it out at www.lookgoodfeelbetter.ca

In just another 5 days I will be going back in for my next treatment. I am now all done with the FEC cocktail and I can only say good riddance to that. I have now talked to several people who have also had it and they had literally no side effects. Yesterday I met a lady who also had the wonder drug that I had and it worked really good for her. It’s hard for me not to be bitter since it was really all pretty bad for me! :-/ Next week I will be starting my one year of Herceptin. It will also be my first of three doses of Taxotere. Since I already have anti nausea medication to take starting the day before (if I forget they won’t give me the treatment) I can’t help but think that this isn’t going to be so great for Berny either. The good thing is that I am half way through these six bad ones. The Herceptin is (supposed) to have no side effects but I will believe that when I see it.

Not so wonderful after all :o(

It turned out that my wonderful drugs only worked for two days. I got three pills and the last one did nothing for me, in fact I felt worse than the last two times. I am now on day 6 and today I finally feel a little more with it. I spent the last 4 days in a fog where I mostly slept and tried to figure out what I could eat to get rid of the burning in my guts. Today I am getting the sore mouth again so I guess that is part of the cycle. This time it feels like I burnt my tongue but I know that when my mouth starts to get sore the other symptoms usually get less. I would much rather have the sore mouth than what I had the last few days anyway! I had an appointment scheduled for a massage yesterday. It took all my energy to get there but I was sure glad I made the effort. I felt so much better after. I went to bed at 8 pm and was able to sleep all the way till 6:30 this morning (with bathroom breaks of course!) That has to be a record for me!

The Wonder Drug

I was absolutely dreading round three but as soon as I got there I met with the Pharmacist and she went over all my drugs with me again and got me to go to the upstairs Pharmacy to pick up my new wonder drug Emend (Aprepitant). She called it the crème de la crème of anti nausea drugs. They are a little expensive at about $40 per pill but with Murray’s drug plan we just had to pay about $26 for the three of them and they are worth every penny. I had to take the first one right away and then wait 1 hour before I could start the chemo. The other two I take with breakfast on days 2 and 3. These are on top of all the other ones I still have to take but I am down to about 14 pills a day. About 3 hours after the chemo I could tell that things were starting. I was getting really tired and feeling kind of worn out but no nausea!! (Although it does come with it's own set of side effects. Very dry mouth, red face, neck and chest and fatigue to name a few) On the way home we stopped in Wakaw for supper and at Joan’s suggestion I just had some toast. That was what I should have been doing all along. Incidentally, in the elevator (an elevator that we never had to use before) on our way up to the Pharmacy there was a sign about signing up for nutrition counseling where you can learn what to eat and what not to eat before and after Chemo. I could have used this information a whole lot sooner but I plan on calling them today and also will suggest that maybe they could have their signs in the waiting rooms!

You know on your first chemo session they give you all these drugs and lots of information to read and you are just bombarded with so many things. It is a little hard to take it all in but by round 3 I have figured out a few things. For instance, on a couple of the symptom charts (that comes with each kind of medication) it says you can have either constipation or diarrhea with them. Now I am no doctor but I think that common sense should tell you that if you are the type of person that suffers from occasional constipation then starting on Day 1 you should take what they give you for that. If you are the type of person that goes the other way then on Day 1 you should start taking what they give you for diarrhea. Also it takes a while to learn which drugs work on the different symptoms. I mean you are taking between 5 and 6 new drugs that you have never seen or heard of before along with dealing with the symptoms of 2 or 3 chemotherapy drugs.

Now I am done the three sessions of FEC (Fluorouracil, Epirubicin, and Cyclophosphamide). YAY!!! That is three down! Next time it will be two new chemo drugs and a whole new ball game of symptoms and drugs to combat these new symptoms.

Another thing I would like to address is some of the emails I have been getting about miracle cancer cures. Now I know that you mean well but I want to tell you now and anyone else who is considering sending something like this to a cancer patient. DON’T DO IT!!! I’ve started on this path where I have placed my trust in the medical profession and I have to see it through. They have been doing this a long time, they are very well organized and they have a lot of research behind them (and ongoing research in front of them). There have been some things I have asked my oncologist about and he is very honest and open with me. For instance yes, take all the vitamins I want (but I can’t usually stomach them anyway), he was a little bit skeptical but yes, if I think acupuncture will help me go for it. Yes, eat whatever I feel like eating including antioxidants (in his opinion nothing has been proven about them interfering with the chemo drugs). I haven’t asked him about drinking asparagus juice by the gallon (an email I have now gotten 3 times) because honey with my nausea that is just a recipe for disaster! That isn’t the only email I have gotten. They are too numerous to mention and frankly I just find them upsetting and they add to the confusion of all I have to learn about and do re the second paragraph above. So again I know you mean well and you have my best interests at heart but please before you send me anything else, check these things out at snopes.com or run them past your own doctor before you send them to me. If (and that is a big IF) I ever get to the point where they say they can’t do anything more for me and I need to get my affairs in order then and only then would I consider trying some of these alternative treatments. Until then for my own sanity it is delete, delete, delete. Now excuse me while I step down off my soap box for today :o)